Tick Tock

I haven't written in awhile... mostly because there just are no words.

Brief summary: My Classical Mythology class - which I do the most work for probably every week - has gone from "challenging" to "yeah, no."  My tutor had a bit of a moment, and now I am getting a new one.  Whatever the first one's issue is, his doctor has advised him to take some time off.  In the aftermath of this, I am rather despondent.  I was doing fine, but now I have a paper due tomorrow at 9 am, or at least I think I do - I really haven't gotten a confirmation on that yet, things are in progress - which is normal, but all my energy to make such a thing happen seems sapped by the drama of it all.  This is unhappy.  On top of that, I am going to meet someone entirely new, so it is "First Paper" time all over again just when I was getting the hang of what the first guy wanted.  This is three weeks from the final day if anyone is counting.  I'll have one assignment from the new instructor for sure, which will hopefully be alright - and possibly a second one which I've asked NOT to have, because it would be due the day before I go to the airport.  That, for me, is not really OK.  I wasn't the one who dropped the ball; I am not the one who should be made to make up the slack.

Meanwhile, I continue to have papers for the other class which is tooling along to its last meeting on Tuesday (thank goodness that stayed on track!) which will lead into the paper for 2nd teacher at the end of the week.  In between that, I need to pull the Seminar paper out of the research I managed to do last weekend for Arthurian Legend (3 or 4 thousand words worth) due the 3rd and get some type of jump on the Integral paper that is due on the 8th.  So if I have yet another 2nd teacher paper due on the 10th, I may have to find an active volcano to start sacrificing virgins to in order to gain the favour of the gods that I may not sleep for these next few weeks to get all of this done.  Huzzah.

This brings me to why I am actually writing this post - because there is no point in attempting to vent the stress and the general exhaustion I am suffering at present, as I said before, there just aren't words that make any of this all better.  Not that I haven't heard a lot of words on the matter - most of them go along the lines of "Well, you wanted a challenge right?" and that is what you, my fellow future comers, will probably hear when this (or something like it) happens during your term here.  The people not here just aren't capable of understanding exactly what you're going to be up against and their words of encouragement, however well meaning, are going to come across as "Well you asked for it" instead of what they are really trying to say which is "I don't understand, but I want to help."  So, be prepared for that if you can be, and understand that no one back home who you reach out to is going to be goading you or brushing you off - they just won't know what you're dealing with exactly enough to make a difference.  Your best bet is to talk to some of the people at CMRS who - even if they are not having their own crisis moment that second - will have some idea of what you are up against.  The downfall there is that these aren't people who will know you intimately well, and so that itself is a limited option.

Basically - it is about just making it through to the next day and the next at the end of the tutorial/seminar cycle.  The Spring comers are the ones I am envying right now, because you guys get to finish with the Integral - so not only will you NOT have that 1 extra paper due in your final tutorial/seminar rotation, but you'll have a month of 'cool down' time to bounce back, treat yourself to some of England, and so on.  Then again, you get thrown right into the tutorial/seminar cycle without a warm up, so maybe it is damned if you do and damned if you don't on one end or the other?  I don't know - you'll have to meet up with me when you get back and tell me how it went (I'll be recovered by then!) ^.~

Oh yeah, it is also Thanksgiving... so happy that to everyone.

The JCR committee is doing something on Saturday that is supposed to resemble a dinner for all of us.  I think it is an ill-concieved notion, but I hope it goes well.  I might go and I might not go - it depends on how much work I have and how much I want to avoid drama (because drama tends to crop up at such things).